Confirmation Pending: While I Wait, I'm Becoming

"The tension between being a woman of faith and still having fire, voice, and personality––all being shaped by God. This is a remainder that becoming isn't boring––it's bold, layered, spirit-led...and sometimes, still confirmation pending...Because even in the waiting, you're not unsure––you're just not moving without peace."

You know what? God really amazes me.

Not in a cliche, "praise Him anyway" kind of way (though, yes––praise Him anyway). But in that "Wow, You really be all knowing..."kind of way.

In that "I didn't see it, but You were ten steps ahead the whole time" kind of way. In that "I asked for clarity and You gave me confirmation, instructions, and a side of conviction" kind of way.

Let me explain.

There's Levels to Your Wait

Singleness is a whole seminary. And I'm convinced that while some people are waiting for a ring, new promotion, whatever it may be, God's giving full degree in discernment. And the final exam? Your tongue. Because just when I think I've mastered "peace be still," here comes a situation where I'm like: "Jesus Jesus...let me tell you something, let me tell you something." You ever feel that? That tension between wanting to be graceful and wanting to tell it like it is and hit send? That's James 3 pulling you by the edges of your soul.

God is like, "My child, I gave you a sharp tongue but it wasn't meant to cut––it was meant to carry wisdom." And I'm over here trying to decide if a well-placed "okay." counts as passive-aggressive or spirit-led silence. Growth, ya'll. Growth. I think that when God delivers you from a situation, you need to apply and put into practice that, "the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts...it corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one's life..." (James 3:5-6).

Taught to Teach, Even While You Wait

Then there's 2 Timothy, tapping me on the shoulder like:

"Preach the word. In season, out of season. Correct. Rebuke. Encourage. And please do it with patience." And I'm like patience?! Sir, I am single, I have questions, and I'm tired of teaching lessons I haven't even lived through yet.

But God.

He's teaching me that you don't have to arrive to speak. You don't have to have the ring, the platform, the man, or the perfect plan. You just need to have obedience and truth––and a mouth willing to say what He gives you. So here I am, sharing what I've learned in the waiting:

• That wisdom is quiet, but she's not silent.

• That your tongue is a weapon––but in the right hands (His), it becomes a healing tool.

• That discernment doesn't always shout, sometimes it just whispers, "Yes, Go", "Wait." or "That ain't it."

The Lord says: "Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly. We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check. (James 3:1-2).

I'm not perfect, I don't have it all together. But I do know this, my heart is open to hear and to receive the word of God. I'm a willing to submit and surrender to His will daily. According to 2 Timothy 3:17, "...the servant of God may be throughly equipped for every good work." God's ultimate plan is for His children is to know Jesus is Christ and that all scripture is truth.

Confirmation Pending

Let's talk about it. That phrase alone has carried me through so many conversations. Let's say someone says something slick, leaves it hanging in the air like a promise with no plan, and you're just like: Let me take this to my Father for clarity and confirmation. The phrase is light, but layered. Funny, but filtered through faith. Because I'm not looking for just connection––but covering.

And if you're reading this in your own season of waiting, hear me:

You're not crazy for wanting depth. Your not needy for asking questions. You're just spiritually aware––and some folks can't meet you there, and that's okay. That's not rejection, it's redirection. So wait on the Lord to confirm, He will.

Fear of the Lord Is... Different

Let's not forget the real meaning behind why I'm writing this:

God is sovereign, holy, terrifyingly good, and somehow still gentle with my process, yours too.

I fear the Lord––not because I'm scared He'll strike me down but because I'm in awe that He hasn't. That even when I almost responded out of pride, or settled out of loneliness, or almost slid into old habits...He whispered, "You know better––because you asked Me to teach you better."

That's love.

That's discipline.

Self-control.

That's a Father who really be knowing all things. Nothing is hidden.

So Here's My Encouragement (and my little clapback to the enemy)

If you're in a season of singleness, waiting, or just trying not to lose your tongue and your mind at the same time:

Let God tame your your mouth before you try to teach someone else with it. Let Him fill your heart before you hand it to someone who won't know what to do with it. Let Him be your first yes before you say yes to anybody else.

And while you're at it, be funny. Be real. be holy. You don't have to water yourself down to be digestible. You just have to stay rooted in God.

He's doing more in your silence than you think.

He's refining your voice, even in the whispers.

He's preparing you––not just to receive love, but to reflect Him when it comes.

Final Word:

God really be knowing all. And you? You're becoming. So let the world see your joy, your process, your praise, and your peace––even in the gym, while dancing, while waiting. Because you don't carry sass. You carry oil.

And the enemy is pressed.

we are not just waiting.

we are in training.

we are not just single.

we are set apart.

we are not overlooked.

we are under divine observation.

And when it’s time, we won’t just be ready—we’ll be rooted and remembered.

Confirmation? Still pending. But obedience? Active.

with love, T.